Can a Wife go on Pilgrimage without her Husband ?
Jan 8, 2012 13:20:31 GMT 5.5
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Post by Kanchi Periva on Jan 8, 2012 13:20:31 GMT 5.5
Author: Sri Ramani Anna (in Tamil)
Source: *Sakthi Vikatan* issue dated Sep 22, 2006
A young *vaidik* couple prostrated to Paramacharya and rose in SriMatam,
Kanchipuram. The young *vaidik* appeared to be around 25 years, his wife
about twenty.
The Acharyal, who was conversing with another *bhakta*, paused it and
looked up at the *dampati*. Happiness spread across his face.
He said with enthusiasm, "Are you not Raghunathan, son of Madurai Seshu
Ganapatikal? But then, I should address you in such a way! Because you have
now become Raghunatha SastrigaL! Like your father, you have become well
known in the Madurai region."
Paramacharya continued: "Obviously, this is your *AmbadaiyaL*. She is the
grand-daughter of Tiruchirapalli Vaidhyanatha Ganapadigal. The only
daughter of Subramanya Vadhyar. Am I right? Last year, your father and
father-in-law both came here with your marriage invitation, to seek the
blessings of Matam. You also came and prostrated, correct? Alright. Now as *
dampati* you are both cooperative and well?" Swamiji asked with rightful
concern.
Raghunatha Sastri promptly replied, "We are very well Periyavaa, with your
blessings."
Swamiji did not accept that. "You have said it, but your wife doesn't open
her mouth!" He laughed as he said this.
Gaining her wits, the young wife replied, "My name is Alamelu, Periyavaa.
We are happy only... happy." Swamiji took note of the thread of sadness
that ran through her acknowledgement.
"It is not that Amma! Your tone betrays that you are not all that happy.
Come on, tell me more."
"Nothing of that sort, Periyavaa", Alamenu tried to get by.
"No, no! Your tone is telling me that you have some sadness. Come on, tell
me what it is."
Alamelu said hesitatingly, "Periyavaa, I am a very God-fearing woman. Have
full faith in the *shastra* and *sampradayakah*. Before my marriage, I used
to go for pilgrimages with our family, relatives, and well wishers. It was
very much to my liking! I am married with him for a year now. And we have
not gone anywhere Periyavaa, that is the cause of my sadness!"
Before she could finish, Swamiji interrupted, "Why...why couldn't you go?"
Alamelu hesitated. "After marriage, I cannot go for pilgrimages on my own,
isn't it so, Periyavaa? Only if the *bharta* comes along with me, the
fruits of the *yAtra* will be realized? I asked him twice or thrice, but he
did not come!" She started crying as she narrated her woe.
Acharyal persuaded her, as he understood the situation. "What Raghunatha
SastrigaL, is it proper to let your wife have a drop of tear in her eyes?
After all is she not asking you to observe a holy routine? *tIrthayAtrA*and
*kshetrAdanam*. What is the difficulty in going as she asks you for?"
Paramacharya raised his bows.
Young Raghunatha Sastry prostrated to the sage once again and said, "What
she asks for is reasonable, Periyavaa. But then to visit the northern *
kshetrA*s for at least ten days, and that bimonthly...is it possible for me
Periyavaa?"
"Why don't you try it and fulfil the affectionate wishes of your wife?"
Raghunatha Sastry replied in a poignant voice, "Periyaa knows everything. I
have *vaidikam* for *vritti*. My father is also not too well, so I have to
take care of his assignments in addition to mine. You tell me Periyavaa,
how can I go for *yAtra* once in two months, leaving aside all my *vritti*?"
Pamaracharya was silent for sometime. Then he said laughingly, "So you both
have come to me for *madhyastha* in this matter," and continued: "What she
says is reasonable. She has a taste for going *tIrthayAtrA* with *bhakti*.
She also knows that after marriage the fruits of any *yAtra* will be
available only if accompanied by the husband. What you say also has reason.
Your *vritti* is *vaidikam*. You will be busy for all the thirty days in a
month. It would be very very difficult to go on *tIrthayAtrA* with wife,
once in two months. So, what can be done?"
"Only you can tell us a way Periyavaa", the husband and wife said together.
Swamiji sat for sometime, thinking. Everyone was eager to know what he
would suggest as a remedy. After sometime, AcharyaL started speaking.
"Alamenu! You are determined to go on *tIrthayAtrA* once in two months. You
also are familiar with the *dharma shastric* rule that the fruits of a *
yAtra* will be realized only if your husband comes with you. Since he has *
vaidikam* as his profession, he says it would be very difficult for him to
accompany you. So you do one thing..."
Before he could proceed, the couple said, "kindly bless us with a solution
Periyavaa."
Sitting a little more uprightly, Swamiji said: "I shall tell you a way,
listen Alamelu! Whenever you start for *tIrthayAtrA*, before actually
stepping out of home, request your husband to stand facing east and
prostrate to him! What you do, Raghunatha SastrigAL, place your upper *
angavastra* in the hands of your wife and tell her that her carrying your
cloth is equivalent to your accompanying her, and bless her for the *yAtra*.
You both will get the *punya* of having undertaken the *yAtra* together.
And neither of you will have any uneasiness of mind. What... happy now?",
Swamiji asked them mercifully and gave them *prasAda*.
The couple were happy with the solution given by MahaperiyavaaL. With tears
of joy, they prostrated to the sage. Everyone around who were witnessing
this incident were happy with Paramacharya's tactful handling of the
situation.
Source: *Sakthi Vikatan* issue dated Sep 22, 2006
A young *vaidik* couple prostrated to Paramacharya and rose in SriMatam,
Kanchipuram. The young *vaidik* appeared to be around 25 years, his wife
about twenty.
The Acharyal, who was conversing with another *bhakta*, paused it and
looked up at the *dampati*. Happiness spread across his face.
He said with enthusiasm, "Are you not Raghunathan, son of Madurai Seshu
Ganapatikal? But then, I should address you in such a way! Because you have
now become Raghunatha SastrigaL! Like your father, you have become well
known in the Madurai region."
Paramacharya continued: "Obviously, this is your *AmbadaiyaL*. She is the
grand-daughter of Tiruchirapalli Vaidhyanatha Ganapadigal. The only
daughter of Subramanya Vadhyar. Am I right? Last year, your father and
father-in-law both came here with your marriage invitation, to seek the
blessings of Matam. You also came and prostrated, correct? Alright. Now as *
dampati* you are both cooperative and well?" Swamiji asked with rightful
concern.
Raghunatha Sastri promptly replied, "We are very well Periyavaa, with your
blessings."
Swamiji did not accept that. "You have said it, but your wife doesn't open
her mouth!" He laughed as he said this.
Gaining her wits, the young wife replied, "My name is Alamelu, Periyavaa.
We are happy only... happy." Swamiji took note of the thread of sadness
that ran through her acknowledgement.
"It is not that Amma! Your tone betrays that you are not all that happy.
Come on, tell me more."
"Nothing of that sort, Periyavaa", Alamenu tried to get by.
"No, no! Your tone is telling me that you have some sadness. Come on, tell
me what it is."
Alamelu said hesitatingly, "Periyavaa, I am a very God-fearing woman. Have
full faith in the *shastra* and *sampradayakah*. Before my marriage, I used
to go for pilgrimages with our family, relatives, and well wishers. It was
very much to my liking! I am married with him for a year now. And we have
not gone anywhere Periyavaa, that is the cause of my sadness!"
Before she could finish, Swamiji interrupted, "Why...why couldn't you go?"
Alamelu hesitated. "After marriage, I cannot go for pilgrimages on my own,
isn't it so, Periyavaa? Only if the *bharta* comes along with me, the
fruits of the *yAtra* will be realized? I asked him twice or thrice, but he
did not come!" She started crying as she narrated her woe.
Acharyal persuaded her, as he understood the situation. "What Raghunatha
SastrigaL, is it proper to let your wife have a drop of tear in her eyes?
After all is she not asking you to observe a holy routine? *tIrthayAtrA*and
*kshetrAdanam*. What is the difficulty in going as she asks you for?"
Paramacharya raised his bows.
Young Raghunatha Sastry prostrated to the sage once again and said, "What
she asks for is reasonable, Periyavaa. But then to visit the northern *
kshetrA*s for at least ten days, and that bimonthly...is it possible for me
Periyavaa?"
"Why don't you try it and fulfil the affectionate wishes of your wife?"
Raghunatha Sastry replied in a poignant voice, "Periyaa knows everything. I
have *vaidikam* for *vritti*. My father is also not too well, so I have to
take care of his assignments in addition to mine. You tell me Periyavaa,
how can I go for *yAtra* once in two months, leaving aside all my *vritti*?"
Pamaracharya was silent for sometime. Then he said laughingly, "So you both
have come to me for *madhyastha* in this matter," and continued: "What she
says is reasonable. She has a taste for going *tIrthayAtrA* with *bhakti*.
She also knows that after marriage the fruits of any *yAtra* will be
available only if accompanied by the husband. What you say also has reason.
Your *vritti* is *vaidikam*. You will be busy for all the thirty days in a
month. It would be very very difficult to go on *tIrthayAtrA* with wife,
once in two months. So, what can be done?"
"Only you can tell us a way Periyavaa", the husband and wife said together.
Swamiji sat for sometime, thinking. Everyone was eager to know what he
would suggest as a remedy. After sometime, AcharyaL started speaking.
"Alamenu! You are determined to go on *tIrthayAtrA* once in two months. You
also are familiar with the *dharma shastric* rule that the fruits of a *
yAtra* will be realized only if your husband comes with you. Since he has *
vaidikam* as his profession, he says it would be very difficult for him to
accompany you. So you do one thing..."
Before he could proceed, the couple said, "kindly bless us with a solution
Periyavaa."
Sitting a little more uprightly, Swamiji said: "I shall tell you a way,
listen Alamelu! Whenever you start for *tIrthayAtrA*, before actually
stepping out of home, request your husband to stand facing east and
prostrate to him! What you do, Raghunatha SastrigAL, place your upper *
angavastra* in the hands of your wife and tell her that her carrying your
cloth is equivalent to your accompanying her, and bless her for the *yAtra*.
You both will get the *punya* of having undertaken the *yAtra* together.
And neither of you will have any uneasiness of mind. What... happy now?",
Swamiji asked them mercifully and gave them *prasAda*.
The couple were happy with the solution given by MahaperiyavaaL. With tears
of joy, they prostrated to the sage. Everyone around who were witnessing
this incident were happy with Paramacharya's tactful handling of the
situation.
